I am approaching the end of my life.

As you have probably noticed, I haven’t posted since the end of October and I apologize for that. But I have a good reason: I’ve been diagnosed with Stage 4 Pancreatic Cancer that has metastasized to my Liver.

I’d been having issues with fatigue and a minor pain around my lower abdomen for awhile and had been working with my primary care to try and figure out what was going on. Went through the process of a colonoscopy which showed no issues with my intestines. Eventually PC told me to head to the ER on December 20th where I was run through a gauntlet of tests where they eventually found the mass on my pancreas and spots on my liver. A biopsy confirmed it was cancer.

I was discharged on the 22nd so I could spend Christmas with the family. And by the 27th I was back in the hospital until January 12th. This was a the start of a roller coaster ride of tests, scans, and treatments. My hemoglobin levels were dangerously low which indicated there was some internal bleeding. Normally it should range between 10 and 12 and I was at 5. I needed to be at a 7 before I could get a port in my chest and start chemo treatments.

To make a long story short, after several blood transfusions to get my hemoglobin up, they find a vein in stomach that was bleeding me out. A clamp on that and then a splenic embolization to reduce blood flowing back into my stomach, I was finally at a point to start chemo treatments.I got through two chemo treatments and another visit to the hospital for low hemoglobin and discovering that I had blood clots in my legs that necessitated putting me on a blood thinner.

In the end, it was clear the chemo treatments weren’t having any effect and the blood thinner was causing issues as well so the decision was made to stop all treatment and enter into hospice. Cancer doc estimates I’ve got weeks left so we’re scrambling to take care of all the stuff that needs to be done to try ensure my wife is taken care of once I’m gone.

The outpouring of love and support from friends and family has been overwhelming. They’ve been helping out as much as they can and have set up a GoFundMe and a silent auction on Facebook to help raise money to pay the medical bills that I’ve run up, which is substantial. If you would like to help out, I’ll post a link to both below.

I don’t know if I’ll have the strength to post again before the end so consider this a farewell post unless it isn’t. Stupid Evil Bastard has been around for 20 years and has enjoyed a lot of voices contributing to it. I’m not sure what will happen to blog once I’m gone, but it might carry on as several people have asked if they could maintain it. I am humbled and flattered that so many people have dropped by over the years to see what nonsense I’ve posted. Thank you for being one of them.

Link to GoFundMe: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-les-beat-this-mess

Link to Silent Auction: https://www.facebook.com/groups/391460392744387/

If you can help it would be greatly appreciated, but if you can’t then feel free to spread the word. Any and all help is greatly appreciated. Also, if you want to follow me on Facebook (all my posts are public) as that’s where I’ve been posting updates on my progress through this whole thing you can do so here: https://www.facebook.com/lesley.t.jenkins

8 thoughts on “I am approaching the end of my life.

  1. So sorry to hear Les.
    My advice is to immediately start high doses of cannabis oil.
    Do large doses with suppositories and work up to larges doses orally.

    I am trying to keep at least a pound on hand at any given time just in case either my wife or I suffer the same fate.
    Good luck to you

  2. Seeing as I’ve followed your blog for most of it’s life (I honestly can’t remember what brought me to it, but I bookmarked it immediately), I feel like I’m losing a member of my family. May you go as you wish to go, and may your family find some comfort in that.

    You will be greatly missed.

  3. Well, hell.

    I’m glad other folk have been offering to take care of the blog; I was going to do likewise.

    I’ve been meaning to ping, or call, or do something more than give thumbs-ups to your lovely wife when she sent out text updates. I’ve always found an excuse not to: not wanting to bug, overstress, wake up, etc. you. Which were at least 40% legit excuses, but …

    Anyway, in case I completely cop out and don’t reach out to you otherwise, thanks for doing SEB, thanks for the podcast/vlog opportunities, and thanks for being a friend whose perspective, humor, and occasional tech help have always been highly valued. The world will be a lesser place without you here, but it’s still better for your having been.

  4. You first showed up on my horizon, I don’t know how, not long after 9/11. And you have brought me perspective and insightful laughter on so many things since then. I would scarcely know where to start or to find the words. The world, or at least how I understand it, is different because you have been here.

  5. May Dog be with you. I don’t know if there is a “god,” but I do know there is a dog. I have seen him and touched him and he has kissed my hand.. Mqy you find something as loving in your next existence, if there is one. Thanks for the memories.

  6. As Greg Bear said somewhere, you pays your price for life coming in and going out. The price for this ride is pain.

    The only important question is: was the ride worth it? I say hell yes. I’ve been priviliged to share some of this ride with you. Ride on and thanks.

  7. I’ll echo sentiments similar to others in that I’ve always enjoyed occasionally checking up on SEB over the years and I’ll be sad if/when I can no longer do so. You’ve earned a friend here.

  8. Pingback: Death | ***Dave Does the Blog

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