It’s a cliche to say that men are selfish pigs, but there seems to be a lot of truth to that statement. Whether it’s sexism and the defense of it that seems to be rampant no matter where you look to polls that reveal that Half of Men Would Dump Their Girlfriends for Getting Fat:
I’m hoping this is because most of the respondents were young and immature — the fact that they asked about “girlfriends” is what I’m latching onto — but I’m worried that’s not the case. Had you asked me back in my teens if I could see myself marrying someone like my wife, I would’ve said no. I was immature and placed more emphasis on outward appearances than I should have.
Fast forward to my early thirties and you’d find that I’ve had a fair number of relationships over the years in spite of not being a strikingly handsome man. All but one of them was broken off by my partner at the time for various reasons that all roughly boil down to my being an immature asshole who didn’t really know what a loving relationship really was. This included at least one person to whom I was engaged for a year because I thought she was The One. I don’t regret any of those past relationships because each one helped me to grow into a better person for the next one that came along. Well, I do regret that it took so long for me to get my shit together because I’ve had the pleasure of being involved with some truly wonderful women over the years and I feel slightly bad about inflicting my (at the time) stupidly immature self upon them.
When my wife and I started dating neither one of us was what you would call svelte. If you asked me what it was I found attractive about her at the time I’d be hard pressed to tell you as she’s very different, both physically and in personality, than any woman I had dated previously. After having had so many relationships that didn’t work out I went into the one with her with a very different and relaxed attitude. At first I wasn’t sure if I was in love or not because it was a very different feel than the past relationships. I think it’s the first time I really keyed in on what love was really like.
The upshot of all that is simply that I love my wife for who she is and not what figure she has. Any concerns I have about the shape of her body is strictly for reasons of health rather than aesthetics, and it’s a concern I hold for myself. I’d like us both to be thinner purely for the health benefits it would bring, but my love for her is not dependent on her having a slim build.
There are a lot of wonderful women in the world who have far less than perfect bodies. It’s a shame that so many men seem willing to pass up what could be a wonderful relationship because they’re hung up on the shape of a woman’s body. And it’s downright hypocritical if the man in question isn’t exactly a great example of being lean and mean himself.