I’ve got new plans for Sunday.

Thanks to this Dork Tower comic:

What a truly awesome idea!

9 thoughts on “I’ve got new plans for Sunday.

  1. If I had known how widespread the press was going to be regarding May 21st, I might have tried to plan some fun. I’ve had a recurring fantasy for years about a practical joke rapture. My idea generally involves somehow taking over the sound system & lighting of a largish, fairly fundamentalist church (at least, one where a fair number of members actually believe in the rapture) and some really good jesus costume & makeup. I always thought Easter service would be a good time, as there are more people in church and the thought of jesus returning on easter seems fitting, but a hyped-up prediction date might work well too since nobody outside the particular group, even other rapture-believing christians, take other churches’ predictions too seriously.

    It sure would be fun to see the faces though, for those few seconds when they are truly entertaining the thought that they’ve been “left behind”…you know, suffering the same cruel fate as they believe 99.99% of the rest of humanity deserves. The whole ideas of heaven, hell, tribulation, and the sudden, unpredictable rapture and merciless final judgement for the “others”, aside from being primarily devices of control through fear, are also made up with a whole heaping helping of tribalism, outsider hating, self-righteousness, and smug superiority…in fact, I believe that those are the unspoken selling points that get people to buy into them. Anyone who feels morally right believing that they are part of “the elect” or “the saved”, who will escape (through no virtue of their own) the horrible and cruel fate that everybody else automatically deserves for the crime of not being exactly the same as the believers, truly deserves a few minutes of helpless terror followed by a nice long stretch of feeling like a shameful dumbass.

  2. The best idea I’ve heard so far is to leave an old pair of boots with dry ice and a little water in them to sit out on the sidewalk or on the church steps.

  3. Well, it’s 6:15am EST. I’m still here (which I expected) but the rest of the local area seems to be as well. TV and radio are still on, but they may be totally staffed by heathens who would be Left Behind Anyway. Of course it’s always possible that God is sleeping in. With luck He won’t get around to the Rapture until after I return from the Renfaire today. 🙂

  4. Gizmodo had a piece about punking the rapture by leaving clothes laying around. I think it’d be funny to pick a megachurch, flashmob tonight and punk the rapture for Sunday morning – leave lots of “raptured” clothing remnants about the parking lot.

  5. I am still here as well, 😉 However about 2 days ago another trucker with all the burn in hell scriptures painted on the back of his truck came over to my dog and I ( Who were minding our own business ) and said Hi…The conversation started out about the weather and such and lead up to his real motives. He ask me if I knew Jesus, and attempted to hand me a pamphlet. Which I refused. I did ask him if he was familiar with narcissistic personality disorders ( Huh ? ). This man dodged everything with quotes. ” No man cometh to the father and such…..”

    I could not resist in asking him ” If a death row inmate converted to Christianity and the people he killed were not Christians. Did they go to hell? And would the murderer go to Heaven after he dies?

    He HeeHaws around that one but finally admits to a ( Technically Yes ! ) Same answer for Nazi Christians and Jewish Death Camps.

    The conversation went quite sour after I told him I thought he had a deluded moral concept about life, and ask had he ever set on a Jury? It ended with him upset by my saying to him that “I did not ask you to come over here and bother us with this bullshit.” And that my dog had higher concepts of ( Right and Wrong ).

    And I believe my dog does in fact subscribe to a more intelligent mentality than this Horseshit they try to pass off.

  6. When he said Saturday did he mention a time, and what timezone? I make it he has until 12:00 GMT tomorrow, just to be sure.

    Also how would we tell? The bit the fundies forget is it is 12000 people each from the 12 tribes of Israel. Out of a population of 7 billion, they possibly won’t be noticed

  7. LH, according to this ABC News entry, it was supposed to start at 6PM:

    They believe it will likely start as it becomes 6 p.m. in the world’s various time zones.

    “We know the end will begin in New Zealand and will follow the sun and roll on from there,” said Garcia, a 39-year-old father of six. “That’s why God raised up all the technology and the satellites so everyone can see it happen at the same time.”

    The Internet was alive with reaction in the hours past 6 p.m. Saturday in New Zealand.

    “Harold Camping’s 21st May Doomsday prediction fails; No earthquake in New Zealand,” read one posting on Twitter.

    “If this whole end-of-the-world thingy is still going on … it’s already past 6.00 in New Zealand and the world hasn’t ended,” said another.

    So far, it’s not looking good. No reports of massive earthquakes (as Camping had predicted there would be) and no reports of lots of people suddenly disappearing. Of course, it’s possible the demonic controlled media is covering it all up.

  8. The Family Radio website is timing out. Either the rapture did happen or there’s a shitload of people trying to find out why it didn’t. 🙂

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