Forget Krismas music. Village of Coleford, Gloucestershire already has decorations up.

If you live in the village of Coleford, Gloucestershire then you’re probably wondering what happened to Halloween right about now:

Cheer up, it’s nearly Christmas: The village which has already put up its decorations – Mail Online

With Hallowe’en and Bonfire Night still to be celebrated, volunteers in Coleford, Gloucestershire, have decorated the streets with festive figures and tinsel.

However, their efforts have not brought goodwill to all men.

Conservative councillor Denis Riley, who lives near the town centre, said: ‘I don’t like seeing Christmas decorations before Bonfire Night but unfortunately this kind of thing happens all over the place.

‘The fact that they have been put up this early suggests to me that it has nothing to do with the true meaning of Christmas and more to do with commercialism and bringing in shoppers.’

What a Scrooge. And a cynical one at that!

No, no, no. There’s a perfectly reasonable explanation as to why the decorations are out this early. There’s simply not enough time to do them all later:

The volunteers claim they were forced to begin work early because of health and safety regulations which state they can only work together on Sundays. This year’s decorations went up quicker than expected.

Volunteer Bryan Marrot said: ‘There will be plenty more decorations to go up which we will be working on until the end on November.

‘We need safety contracts and insurance to cover working on the ladders and using cherry picker cranes. Doing all the safety checks takes a lot of time so we start as early as possible to make sure we have them done in time.’

See? It’s bureaucracy that’s the reason for the (early) season!

5 thoughts on “Forget Krismas music. Village of Coleford, Gloucestershire already has decorations up.

  1. Remember what Tom Lehrer said about National Brotherhood Week:

    It’s only for a week, so have no fear
    Be grateful that it doesn’t last all year

  2. On Christmas Day you can’t be sore
    Your fellow man you must adore
    there’s time to rob him all the more
    the other three hundred and sixty four.

    I have seen Christmas decoration shops in the middle of summer in Stratford upon Avon and Bourton on the Water.

    On a related note: Les I personally find the KRISmas thing annoying.  I feel its the sort of thing that makes atheism look silly.  Celebrate Yule, Midwinter, Saturnalia or Newtons Birthday even, but this parody helps no-one. 

    Midwinter festivals are an ancient (pre-christian) European tradition- the days are short, you’ve been living of salted and jerked meat for months, and its bloody cold- what better excuse for a piss up.  Combine it with a celebration of family, a chance to toast ‘absent freinds’ or reflect on those for whom the 25th will be just another day of struggle, but this deliberate mis-spelling deflects the arguement into ‘look at the evil atheists, apeing their betters’.  Why celebrate a CHRISTIAN saint anyway?

  3. It’s not meant as a parody, but as a recognition of something that’s been there all along. I’m not sure I see how calling it Yule, Saturnalia, Midwinter, or Newton’s Birthday is any less like a parody that Krismas is.

    Kris Kringle isn’t necessarily the same as Saint Nicholas, but an amalgamation of a number of different myths and legends.

  4. The first 3 at least are historical alternatives. 

    Personally I’d amalgamte it with New Year, and start each year on the day after the shortest day (or close enough- I have a feeling if can vary 21st or 22nd).  Both 25/12 and 1/1 are effectively arbitary (though I am not ignorant of the reprogramming problems).

    In the UK 25th and 26th are bank holidays, as is the 1st Jan.  This causes a odd slack period 27-31st Dec, some places shut, others on skeleton staff/use leave situation, others business as usual.  I’d go for 3 or 4 days straight, depending on week ends.  Gives time to get round relatives, and makes it all easier to co-ordinate.

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