True Bible Decoders, as I predicted, keep making predictions.

Time to check in with the wacky folks of The Lords’ Witnesses and the True Bible Code who have been unsuccessfully predicting a nuclear bomb would blow up the U.N. Plaza in New York since last April. When we last checked in they were up to their 10th guess and were entertaining the idea that they might give up if it turned out not to come true. It was a startling admission that gave us all hope that they might finally shut the hell up and stop making fools of themselves, but it was silly to get our hopes up. I said in my last entry that I wasn’t optimistic they’d actually stop if they were wrong as they’d just come up with a new excuse to keep on guessing and it turns out my cynicism was right as they’re now onto their 11th guess. At this rate I’ve got a better success rate at making predictions than they do, but then my predictions are pretty safe ones to make given the nature of the people we’re dealing with here.

Anyway, here’s the excuse they’re using this time:

On April 29th we started predicting dates for a terrorist Nuclear Bomb at the UN in midtown. After making several mistakes we thought that that 1 Kings 18:43 declared we would get it right at the 8th attempt (Since Elijah asked his attendant to go and look for a man made mushroom cloud 7 times after the first no show, making 8 attempts in all). The trouble with that interpretation is that it co-existed with the interpretation that the 7 festival lookouts symbolised 7 different nuclear bombs each one falling between the next pair of annual festivals. There were 3 annual festivals in the law of Moses, and there should likewise be 3 annual Christian festivals of the same days in our understanding – see U209. So we had two different interpretations of the same verse of scripture, 1 Kings 18:43. We did note in our commentary on that verse that we had never done this before and it might be a mistake. Well, it was. We have now run out of options with the 7 festival lookout mistakes interpretation for the first bomb. Here are the mistakes we made…

[list snipped to save space]

No nuclear bomb hit the UN on any of the above days. However this failure in prediction presented us with a larger problem than our double interpretation of 1 Kings 18:43. Fixing 1 Kings 18:43 was easy, we merely reverted to a single interpretation, which with hindsight we should have never left. But with research one has to try new ideas!

What’s sad about all of this is that they claim this is “research” when it’s really just a bunch of idiots sitting around making guesses based on Bible versus that don’t have any relation to modern day events. They also own up to the fact that they’ve never done this before yet they still expect people to take them seriously and make plans to avoid being in New York on the dates they keep plucking out of their asses as if there’s any rational basis behind them. If you lived in New York and had taken these guys seriously every time they put out a warning you’d have wasted 11 weekends you could’ve been doing something more productive.

Being True Believers™ through and through, though, they won’t let a little thing like complete and utter failure 10 times in a row get in the way of their belief that they’re just this side of getting it right. At this rate I’ll probably give up on reporting on them long before they give up making predictions.

11 thoughts on “True Bible Decoders, as I predicted, keep making predictions.

  1. All of this bullshit kinda makes you wonder if the nutjobs behind this website and supposed research are for real or just hoaxing people.

  2. Why do people feel the need to do this crap? I remember when I was in high school. I was with a bunch of guys camping out on a hilltop. I was lazily staring up at the sky at one point when it occured to me that the world was supposed to end that night. You see, when I was 12 or so, my Mother declared us all Jehovah’s Witnesses and we attended the local kingdom hall twice a week for 3 years. My mother did alot of soul searching, and she drug us kids along for the ride.
    So, it’s 6 years later, I’m on a hilltop with a bunch of partying high school guys and I remember that the day the Witnesses had diligently factored out was that very night. I remember turning to a couple of guys sitting around the fire with me that tonight the world is supposed to end. We all laughed and had another beer.
    I remember there was alot of backlash to the Witnesses organization over that prediction. But, as above, they just sited a couple of oversights and set another date.
    This is one of many things in my life that showed very clearly that these people aren’t worth listening to.

  3. Ok, which one of these methods has the mode credibility?

    A: smoking ‘incense’ and reading the bible
    B: playing with an ouiji board
    C: hanging a crystal from a wire to watch it spin
    D: meditation

    I’ll swear up and down these bible decoders are either stoners, opiate fiends, pill poppers, ice heads, or something along the lines of drug users, because nowhere else have I seen such logic be shitout and put on public display.

    Also, I would love it if someone put high quality pot in the incense burner at a mass and tell me if anyone notices the difference.

  4. Are we sure this whole thing isn’t an elaborate joke?

    No. Not funny enough. I wonder why Les keeps blogging about them time after time…


    On the other hand, Les, you do them a wrong. They are actually doing something very clever. By simply repeating their prediction in an updated form, they increase their chances by sheer persistence. As the number of their predicted dates approaches (but does not reach) infinity, the chances of them being right one day approaches (but does not reach) certainty!

    Sure, not 100%, but a lot better than nothing, eh?

  5. Ing: Sure, not 100%, but a lot better than nothing, eh?

    I’d rather have $10 on them getting it right eventually than $10 on god existing. smile

  6. I checked out the site – I notice that the list of “those notified of the Jewish Sabbath” for each particular date gets shorter and shorter with each new prediction.  Maybe after several closely grouped duds, the media are not as interested.  They’re grouping them too close together.  You only keep the interst and frenzy up if you let the tension build between non-dooms-days, then admit to a miscalculation and issue a new prediction for a couple of months or a year out.  Then you can anticipate, warn, prepare, gnash teeth, wail and moan up to just before that date, and then come up with a mis-calculation or find some little quirk or action that has delayed doomsday for a little longer (a reprieve!  Haleluja!)  Nobody seems to know to throw a good Armageddon these days.

  7. If they only had the resources, they could nuke the UN themselves!  That’d show everybody!

    I maintain they should push the 12th occurance, as it fits the number of tribes of Israel and disciples at the Last Supper.

  8. If you run the right algorithm through Les’ original post you get the message

    give last hussar lots of money

    Go, now, do it, before everybody else tries to do it to claim it’s their miracle…

  9. I’ve posted a couple of replies at their site, trying to win souls for Darwin, but I’m afraid it’s an uphill battle…

  10. This is how you decode the Holy Bible
    The Holy Bible was originally written in Hebrew. Most scholars argue that the New Testiment was also. That’s a Lie from Hell.
    The names in the new testiment were translated to greek names. But one name stood out. the name Satan. Satan is a hebrew name. But they didnttranslated it. That indicated that the NT was in Hebrew.

    Deuteronomy 10:12 Commandment. Love the Lord the God with all your mind and soul
    Decoded: Love King Yahweh, the God of Isreal with all your mind.
    Exodus20:7Thou shall not take the name of the Lord in vain
    Decoded: Do not changed, translate, forget or lightly esteem the name YAHWEH
    Decoded: Vain means to literally ruin: literally speaks of literature: literature is speaking of letters. ” Exodus 20:7 is saying :”do not change the letters in the name Yahweh. Yahweh is not to be called Lord, God or Jesus..His name is Yahweh forever. Not Jehovah,el shaddi, Adoni, is YAAHWEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    The hebrew had no letter J. Any name with a J is FALSEHOOD
    Question..If you change a holy name into another name is it stiLL the same/holy?
    As you see in this verse (Exodus 3:15) you dont see a name even though they speak of a name. The catholic church had the name YAHWEH banned (see catholic archives)from songs and the Holy bible. Therefore, when you became a christian, you had already broken the Ten commandments because you didnt have the right name to call on.
    Exodus 20: 13Thou shall not steal
    Decoded: Thou shall not steal the minds of people by Telling them about other gods.
    Question: Do people call Jesus God today? If so, read on…
    Isaiah 43:10-11
    10 Before me there was no god “FORMED”, neither shall there be after me.
    11 I even I am the LORD and besides me there is NO SAVIOR
    Decoded:10 Before YAHWEH there was no SAVIOR “FORMED in a woman’s stomach, or made by people’s hand, neither shall there be after the Old Testiment.
    11 I even I am KING YAHWEH and besides me there is NO SAVIOR. Jesus is A False Savior!
    Think about Buda…you see a fat man in your mind
    Think about see a white man in your mind

    Whats the difference?
    There just not the same size
    There both Idols
    They were both drew or made by people.

    He that worship YAHWEH must worship in SPIRIT AND IN TRUTH
    He that worship Jesus has to worship in Flesh and in Ignorance

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