OK kids, let’s take a break from all the video game news goodness for a little update on how the search for Weapons of Mass
DistractionDestruction is going. Total number of WOMDs found to date? Zero. Got that? As in “nothing”, “zilch”, “zippo”, “nada”, “diddly squat”, “naught”, “the big goose egg” and “squat.” Hell, the Michigan Militia probably has more WOMDs than Iraq does. So the fine folks that make up the 75th Exploitation Task Force are saying “fuck it” and coming home.
The 75th Exploitation Task Force, as the group is formally known, has been described from the start as the principal component of the U.S. plan to discover and display forbidden Iraqi weapons. The group’s departure, expected next month, marks a milestone in frustration for a major declared objective of the war.
Leaders of Task Force 75’s diverse staff—biologists, chemists, arms treaty enforcers, nuclear operators, computer and document experts, and special forces troops—arrived with high hopes of early success. They said they expected to find what Secretary of State Colin L. Powell described at the U.N. Security Council on Feb. 5—hundreds of tons of biological and chemical agents, missiles and rockets to deliver the agents, and evidence of an ongoing program to build a nuclear bomb.
Scores of fruitless missions broke that confidence, many task force members said in interviews.
Remember when we were told that Saddam had literally tons of this shit laying around ready to use? Remember when the administration kept pounding home the message that our first and foremost reason for going into Iraq was to rid Saddam of his weapons of mass destruction?
- “After Secretary of State Powell’s presentation to the United Nations Security Council, the world knows that Saddam Hussein has weapons of mass destruction, even though he said he didn’t, and that he is not complying with the United Nations demands to destroy them. He is actively deceiving the inspectors. He is actively hiding the weapons. And so the Security Council, earlier on, gave Saddam Hussein one final chance to disarm, and he’s throwing that chance away.”—G.W. Bush, Presidential Remarks, February 20th, 2003.
You’d think that with such bold statements that Army Col. Richard McPhee and his team would be practically tripping over the stockpiles yet WOMD have been so scarce that the discovery of a truck that might have been used as a mobile chemical weapons lab causes the news media to nearly cream its collective pants. Granted, out of the top 19 weapons sites flagged as possible locations for WOMD there are still two to be searched and of the top 68 non-WOMD sites listed they’ve only gotten through 45 of them, but that doesn’t leave a lot of places to find this stuff and the places that have been searched have turned up absolutely nothing. Let me repeat that with emphasis:
Where’s the outrage? Where’s the calls for impeachment? Sure, we’ll impeach a guy for getting a little head in the Oval Office, but that whole invading-a-country-for-a-bogus-reason-and-killing-lots-and-lots-of-it’s-citizens thing? I suppose that’s a mistake any two-bit moron who was handed the Presidency could make.
Whew! It sure is a relief that Saddam is gone now and can’t threaten us with his huge stockpiles of nothing! I’d sure hate it if he ended up dropping all that nothing on one of our major cities! And think of the damage that could be done if he sold all of that nothing to terrorists!
Say, where is that guy calling himself The Pissed off AMERICAN anyway? I think he owes me a big, fat ass-kissing right about now.