Virgin Mary image appears on a fence post. Religious-types freak out.

Seems the folks down in Australia are getting a little of the old holy-image-appears-on-random-object-Christians-start-acting-like-total-whack-jobs fun of their own as of late. So says The Sydney Morning Herald:

Hundreds of believers flocked to the Coogee Beach headland yesterday to witness what they say is an apparition of the Virgin Mary.

Scores more hiked up the cliff path to touch, kiss and pray to the post which over the past few days has been transformed into something of a shrine, with pictures of the virgin, rosary beads and flowers piled around the white-washed fence.

Some wept, others sang, most prayed. As the sunlight reflected off a crook in the fence throughout the afternoon, hundreds claimed they could discern the shape of a veiled figure, and most agreed it was “Our Lady”.

They kissed a fence post?! Do they not realize that dogs tend to urinate on fence posts? I suppose that’s a little better than rubbing their naked asses against it.

This is one of those things about Christians that I just don’t understand. First off, why would Jesus and his Mother spend so much time drawing pictures of themselves into various random objects such as trees, fence posts, office building windows, or whatever other random inanimate object happens to be around at the time when they could do a much better job of letting people know they really exist by, say, materializing in the middle of the Today show set and performing an undeniable miracle such as making Al Roker actually interesting, or at least entertaining, to watch? Huh? Is that too much of a miracle for the King of Kings to pull off? I realize I’m asking a lot here.

No, instead we get nothing but pathetic doodles that have less artistic merit than something produced by a blind epileptic quadriplegic. Artistically speaking, Jesus should stick to turning water into wine and leave the art stuff to the professionals.

Secondly (yeah, I did have more questions), why the hell when one of these shoddy self-portraits appear do all the Christians in the immediate vicinity feel they have to:

A) rush immediately to the site in question
B) touch, rub, kiss, fondle, molest, pray, cry, or faint
C) generally make a nuisance of themselves?

They do that by clogging streets, leaving various “gifts” (someone eventually has to pick that shit up), trampling people’s lawns and just generally not doing anything productive or important despite all the problems they cause by being there. What the fuck is wrong with these people?

When was the last time you heard of a bunch of Jews freaking out because a vague image of some holy figure of their’s showed up on someone’s kreplach? How the last time you heard about a load of Muslims spazzing because one of them saw the face of Mahomet appear in the pattern of the wood grain of some random door someplace? You never hear about that sort of thing.

Occasionally the Hindus will make a big deal out of a statue of one of their various Gods they have supposedly drinking milk, but that’s about the only other religious group I can think of that has anything close to what the Christians are constantly reporting and it’s about a dumb as the idea of Jesus drawing bad pictures of himself everywhere.

Whatever. There are days when I’m feeling particularly evil that I just know there’s a great set of pranks to be pulled using this affinity of Christians to practically wet themselves over this sort of thing. One of these days I may have to see if I can pull it off.

221 thoughts on “Virgin Mary image appears on a fence post. Religious-types freak out.

  1. I also wont be posting this without using spell check.

    nice….i WON’T either.  if spelling means so much to you eric, i sure hope youre doing a good job.  go get em squirt!

    anyhoo,

    “Jethric1”
    Is Les an asshole? That’s up to you to decide. But regardless, he at least stays on the subject and tends to rely on logical progression of thought, rather than emotion and cliche to make his points.

    good “masterdebators”  (hehe, i made a funny.  look mommy!)  always use emotion.  the reason i didnt read your bullshit above about infinity and whatnot was because it looked BORING.  have you ever seen someone stand in front of class and just read?  that was you.  in debate a judge (yes, there is a judge since both people are susposidly already unmovable from their views)  will fall asleep if you read.  they could care less what you have to say about infinity.  but if they see a person who says something with “emotion and cliche”, they are MUCH more likely to win.  (hint hint, my medal?  of course, one of your “posse” found a way to pretty much demean it.  you know, i defanged you to not do it, so whats his face came in to do it for you.  nice work, squirt.  also, im still in school.  im sure all of you are like 45 or something and are in mid life crisises, so ill try to leave you alone.  and that medal was at a tournament.  i doubt any of you have ever debated in a tournament with REAL PEOPLE)

    now, i know that this is in your safe realm of the internet where anything goes, but some of you obviously need to get out of your asshole phase.  kind of like having your time of the month everyday….  if you want to know people, and not just wonder in awe why they leave you, i think you should be nicer.  girls like that.  i would know, even though im only in high school.  (there is aboslutely no ground to be gained by you here.  i am in high school.  you are like 30-45 guys living in your basement still wondering what to do with your life.  get out of your “online fraternity” and go do things, mmmkay?)

    and please, dont pin any of this on me.  all i did was simply turn the tables and put the magnifying glass on you.  (just think about it, mmmkay children?)  if you can’t take the heat without throwing a big fit, then move.

    au revoir.  i have other emails to respond to.

  2. You are such a riot! I damned near fell out of my chair laughing my ass off over this latest response from you! Thank you for confirming that you’re still in High School, it really does explain a lot, and I mean A LOT, about you. Short attention span. Inability to spell or capitalize. General lack of clues.

    Let’s see. First you say I’m a “high school rebel that had lots of friends in high school” who was only popular because of my “‘rebellious’ lack of religion” and that I had “theist friends” that I called “‘stupid’ and mindless” behind their backs and now I live “in a small house” and I “probably have a girlfriend” and my hobby is “making fun of people over the internet” because all the people I know in real life “either moved away or hate you.”

    Now you’re telling me that I’m “45 or something and are in mid life crisises” and that I “need to get out of your asshole phase” and that “if you want to know people, and not just wonder in awe why they leave you” that I should be “nicer” because “girls like that” which you know because you’re apparently some form of expert on women while I’m “living in your basement” and still trying to figure out what to do with my life and that I should “get out of your ‘online fraternity’” and go do something worthwhile.

    So, which is it? You seem to have all the answers here. Which of the above two descriptions is the “real” me?

    I don’t have to sic anyone on you and I don’t have to rip you apart myself. Merely reading your comments is all anyone needs for a good belly laugh. Come on back once you make it past the age of 25 and have a little life experience under your belt and we’ll chat again. I used to go to school with kids just like you. They eventually grew up, I’m sure you will too.

  3. Oh no, hoisted by my own petard! Damn that shareware spell checker, I will certainly give them a piece of my mind. Well, by virtue of that revelation alone I withdraw my arguments as spurious and award the debate medal to you.

    I have not had a really good laugh in what seems like months…thanks testicleman. I don’t know what I found most amusing; your insistence that clich

  4. obviously you have no common sense.

    i could tell from your comments (earlier than mine) that you apparently have a wife and whatnot.  your private life i could care less about, but no one at my school has a wife yet.  therefore, you must be older than you.  when you apparently thought i thought that you were in high school, i was describing your past.  now im describing your present.  (note—both of these descriptions are my views, and not reality.  and no, i dont have all the answers about your pathetic life.  you do)  perhaps thats a bit too hard for you to fathom.  i knew by the way you wrote that you were an adult.  obviously you couldnt tell how old i am.  oh well…

    anyhoo, i find that im much more growed up than you are.  i dont go on the internet to destroy peoples lives.  i never did that as a child, maybe its genetic-hey!  a leftover piece from evolution!  yep.  that explains why youre such an asshole.  its not you, its your “instincts”. 

    now, i seriously doubt that many people come to this website, or at least leave a post.  therefore, not many people (but you and your perverted mind, and of course, your posse of fellow atheists (perhaps)) and i dont see the humor in my posts.  maybe youre making something from nothing.  oh yeah, only god can do that…and you dont believe in god.  that sucks…

    Well, you keep telling me directly and indirectly to leave, but you keep replying to my “unending” posts, but i doubt that ill come back.  in my mind, you’ll start searching for someone like me when youre 65 and dying of some rich country disease like cancer (another evil caused by genetics!  remember, its our fault we have it, not gods.  we’re the idiots that evolved.(humor, humor…I AM NOT BEING SERIOUS HERE, OK, SO YOU DONT NEED TO ARGUE IT WITH ME LIKE YOU HAVE BEEN DOING WITH MY SARCASTIC COMMENTS, D’ACCORD?  C’EST BON.) or heart disease, and want some assistance of some kind.  just trust me, im sure you will.

    well, i have other emails to go use my “bad grammar skills” on, so a tout a’lheure!

  5. I have not had a really good laugh in what seems like months

    depression is bad, eric person.  mabye you should get checked out. 

    thanks testicleman

    look mommy!  he made another funny!  lets see what other homosexual jokes he has up his pants..i mean sleeve.

    I don’t know what I found most amusing; your insistence that clich

  6. To the Evil Bastard and his Correspondents:
    HEY! Knock off that incessant chatter, will ya? I’m trying to get some rest here. Do you have *any* idea how much energy it takes to create an infinite number of parallel universes, every one of them filled with guys like you blathering endlessly about philosphy and religion and whether or not I exist… have a little consideration. I suppose I have only Myself to blame, of course, but it *is* tiring.

    Hey Les, you think you have a good time observing and poking fun at the insanity? You should have my seat! It’s a laff riot from up here! And the funniest thing? Almost nobody gets it. Nobody sees that the the debate is irrelevant. (Granted, a lot of them can’t see it because they’re just not bright enough; again, mea culpa).

    Here’s a key to understanding the big secret, unknown by most of the blind worshipful theists, and ignored by even the brightest thoughtful athesists:  I don’t exist, but I do exist. When you can hold those two ideas in your mind at the same time, really hold on to them and believe them both, then you’ve got a start on knowing what’s going on. But just a start, so don’t start getting uppity.

    I’m gonna get a nap now.

    -Infinitely Unconcerned with whether you believe anything I’ve said or not, I remain— GOD

  7. Well, that was amusing if nothing else. Though methinks someone’s been reading too much Douglas Adams as of late.

  8. Here’s another reason that I, at least, ignore anything Ventricleman has to say:

    it’s hard to take anyone seriously who refuses to use simple rules when it comes to writing. you know, capitalization, things of that nature.

    He does come across as a high school kid, doesn’t he?

  9. My first impulse is to say that he came across more as a middle school or junior high school student, but then I realized that many high schools in America these days do allow folks with such weak literacy to graduate so it’s entirely possible he could be a high school student.

    Which leaves me torn as I think the public education system is a good thing that is in bad shape right now. VentricleMan is a perfect example of the problems the public education system is experiencing.

    We want teachers to do more than just teach. We want them to be surrogate parents and pastors and counselors, but only if they impart a limited range of values that differs from parent to parent. All of that on top of how to read, write, add and subtract. Then we reward them with sub-standard pay and swelling class room sizes and lawsuits if the teacher so much as dares to give little Johnny a failing grade.

    The end result? Kids like VentricleMan who not only have a screwed up sense of reality, but are totally incapable of expressing themselves and their ideas in anything resembling a coherent fashion. These kids are supposed to be our future and someday he’ll be able to vote in national elections. Scary thought isn’t it.

  10. its actually a more scary thought that the ADULTS of society are even more fucked up than the kids.  at least we have each other to look after rather than the pathetic role models the adults are.  all of them (including you, i must say) have major depression, a mid-life crisis, and denial/withdrawls.  apparently being a high school student is actually better than an adult.  at least they dont judge people AS MUCH as adults do.  adults seem to have all the answers, or at least allibies for why they dont, but deep down, all of them are depressed because they have closed themselves into a little room inside their brain and only come out to put people down.  i think thats kind of bad. 

    here, even when you were bashing me for being bad at grammar, you all made LOTS of mistakes. 

    it’s hard to take anyone seriously who refuses to use simple rules when it comes to writing. you know, capitalization, things of that nature.

    are you a complete dumbass?  you didn’t even fucking capitalize the sentence you were bashing me for.  you REALLY have some problems.  and quite frankly, i dont give a damn about my capitalization.  you arent worth the effort.

     

    My first impulse is to say that he came across more as a middle school or junior high school student, but then I realized that many high schools in America these days do allow folks with such weak literacy to graduate so it’s entirely possible he could be a high school student.

    (the sentence below is BLATANTLY incomplete.  you need to connect the two, dumbass.  perhaps you should take a trip down “memory lane”  and see who’s right)

    Which leaves me torn as I think the public education system is a good thing that is in bad shape right now. VentricleMan is a perfect example of the problems the public education system is experiencing.

    quite frankly, its amazing how you complain.  i mean, you know EVERY issue on how teachers lives SUCK.  but do you do anything whatsoever about them?  no.  all you do is blame the “other tax payers” for the flaws that the schools apparently have.  remember, “Les”, actions speak louder than words.  there really is no consolation for complaining your ass off on the web.  no one that does charity work could give a shit

    i have to go help some little kids.  au revoir.  (see, the school systems arent that fucked after all.  I know french!)

  11. Yo~~~>Les   You are so funny witty and insightful, I truly enjoyed reading your thoughts ROTFLMAO!! Butttt and yes there is always a~~>Butt…I would rather be sitting on a pew next to a hypocrite in Church, than sitting next to them on a rock in HELL….wonder how many images and fence posts and silly christians there are down there anyhoo????

  12. Do you know what the best thing about VentricleMan is? He’s like a toy that doesn’t need batteries. Just wind him up and he goes and goes and goes.

  13. you all need to get lives.  all of you are contradicting yourselves everytime you say something.  none of you are really alive, you are only robots.  oh well…

  14. I’m new here, so feel free to write hateful responses, etc. I find it amusing. All I ask is that you at least read my post first before patronizing me. And, by the way, I don’t think I have it in me to even bother responding to those who have horrible grammar and or lack of punctuation usage, simply because if whomever reads this is intelligent at all, they should be able to express themselves accordingly. “Typos” are one thing, but using absolutely no punctuation or having awful grammar in general is a clear demonstration of one’s lack of intelligence. And one more thing- if you have not read this book, then there is no sense in responding to this post either. Now that we’re clear on this, here’s my post:

    I just read “Abduction to the 9th Planet” (“Thiaoouba Prophecy”) by Michel Desmarquet. I was fascinated by the book, but I can’t say I believe Michel was actually abducted as he insists. I’d imagine that most people who actually read this book from start to finish will find it hard to classify it as non-fiction, but regardless if the story is true or not, all the ideas he discussed offered an extremely interesting perspective. Apparently Marquet is offering a one thousand dollar reward for anyone, especially scientists, to prove any single theory in this book as false, as shown on the website. (http://www.thiaoouba.com) To date, none of his theories have been proven false.

    I am not a personally a religious person, but I do fully respect those who are. No matter what you believe in though, I still think this is an interesting read and at the very least it will provide a really different perspective on the universe and many of the mysteries on earth. Again, let me emphasize that I am not saying I believe this story is true, but I do find the ideas and theories discussed to be interesting. If this is all just a big joke, it is exceptionally well done and I think Michel Desmarquet should be given credit simply for his effort alone. In the least, he is a very creative writer and extremely thorough. The ideas expresssed seem to intertwine with one another very naturally, with no loopholes that I noticed.

    Anyone have anything in particular to discuss about the book? I don’t want to comment on any particular subject matter from the book until I see that there are other individuals who have read it and care to talk about it. I don’t want to waste my time trying to discuss this with people who don’t care!

    Thanks for reading my post,
    Darren

  15. Darren,

    I haven’t read the book, but I went to the website, and my initial reaction was that this was another just a new-age spiritualist organization, like the Raelians.

    The basis for this is that the first page hit most of the New Age themes…better health through positive thought, “proof” of man’s purpose on the planet as it relates to cosmology, auras and something about planet Earth exploding due to the nuclear reaction going on inside it.

    While I don’t necessarily think that everything about these topics are wrong…taken as a whole, though, my reaction is “where to begin” closely followed by “why bother.”

    I will address the one about the earth exploding, though, because it’s their big action item.

    Will the earth explode? I seriously doubt it, but I wouldn’t bet my soul on it. If it is, there isn’t much we can do about it anyway.

    However, the idea that it’s an out-of-control nuclear reaction is just silly. It can’t be a nuclear reaction for two main reasons:
      – The materials are wrong for either fission or fusion.
      – If it was nuclear, the reaction would make the earth seriously exothermic, which it isn’t.

    To have a nuclear fission reaction requires uranium or other fissionable material. The measurements we’ve taken of what exists inside our planet is not sufficiently dense to be uranium. Most likely it’s iron or nickel, with traces of heavy elements thrown in.

    As for the possibility of fusion…that just isn’t possible. The amount of mass and energy required to fuse anything other than hydrogen is so massive it requires something the size of a star. And if we WERE doing carbon/iron fusion, we would “soon” be a black hole, probably…not likely for something 1/10000th of the size of our relatively small sun.

    And while Jupiter (as I understand it) is actually an exothermic planet, earth is not. No sun, and we cease to exist in a matter of hours.

    Anyway, since this is their “big item” and it just doesn’t sit with anything we understand about geology and cosmology…I will chalk it up as representative of most of the rest of their philosophy.

    If the earth explodes, I will offer both you and them a heartfelt apology. smile

  16. Thanks for responding to my post. It’s interesting that you bring up the possibility of the earth exploding, because the book also mentions that our moon is going to crash into the earth in approximately 195,000 years. Of course I can’t say I fully believe this, but according to the book it also mentions that the dinosaurs became extinct when one of earth’s moons (apparently we had two moons during the prehistoric time period, or at least this book says so) crashed into the earth, causing a total catastrophe.

    I still recommend reading the “Thiaoouba Prophecy” if you get a chance. As I stated before, even if the reader thinks it’s all science fiction, it’s really still quite an interesting read!

    Take care,
    Darren

  17. Well Darren, based on the rules you’ve set forth in your original post I’m afraid I can’t comment too much about it. I have come across the book previously, but failed to make it through the first chapter before falling down in fits of laughter so I’ve not read the whole thing. I don’t know that I would use the word “interesting” to describe the contents of said book. “Amusing” perhaps, but not “interesting.”

  18. Fair enough, Les. Your honesty is appreciated. Out of curiosity though, do you think there is life on other planets? I definitely think there is, but that doesn’t mean I believe Earth has ever been visited by any aliens. I only think there is life on other planets because the universe is so overwhelmingly large. Correct me if I am wrong, but wasn’t life actually found on Mars a few years ago? When I say life, I am referrring to nothing more than certain types of bacteria and other similar organisms- nothing humanoid. I could very well be wrong, but I vaguely remember hearing about that somewhere.

  19. My views about life on other planets is pretty much the same as yours. With what little study I’ve done of cosmology, biology and the theory of probabilities I find it very difficult not to believe that life is a very abundant thing in the universe. As each day goes by we’re discovering life existing in the most extreme of environments right here on Earth in places we once thought could not support it. Not only existing, but thriving.

    Given the ridiculously mind-boggling number of stars in our own galaxy combined with the ridiculously mind-boggling number of galaxies in the known universe, the probability of life existing elsewhere, even complex life forms capable of sentience, is much higher than you might at first think.

    But, like you, I seriously doubt they’ve stopped by the Earth anytime recently. I don’t rule it out, but I find it very unlikely given what we currently know about physics and the lack of credible evidence to the contrary.

    As for the life on Mars thing that occurred a couple of years ago, as far as I’m aware they’ve never conclusively determined one way or the other if what they found were truly fossilized remains of simple organisms or not. I think the jury’s still out on that one, but I haven’t checked into it lately.

  20. I think we’re on the same page here. Now,  I know this is totally off topic for this particular forum, but what is your take Ouija Boards? I used to pass Ouija Boards off as just total BS, but then I tried using one several years ago just to test my skepticism and see what would happen. Well, surprisingly enough, I had several “psychic” experiences, for lack of a better descriptive word. I won’t go into detail as to what happened exactly, but my point is simply that I now believe there is something to them. No, I don’t think the boards themselves are anything special, but I do think that at least they can be a tool to help one (or two) to get in touch with their subconscious minds. And to clarify, I still remain a bit skeptical about them, but I have had a few direct experiences as I mentioned that have given me a different perspective on them as tools.

    Sorry for this odd and off topic discussion. I’ll admit, I’m a bit bored, stuck in Fredonia NY with nowhere to go for two weeks. Thanks for humoring me. grin

    Darren

  21. If matter and energy cannot be created, how were they created?
    Where did the entire physical universe come from?

    can you answer these questions “Les”?  id be very glad to see your response

  22. And here I was thinking we’d seen the last of you. Still, a reasonable question though you won’t like the answer.

    If matter and energy cannot be created, how were they created? Where did the entire physical universe come from?

    The theory you are questioning states that matter and energy are just two different forms of the same thing. The energy itself wasn’t created as it has always existed. Energy cannot be destroyed, it can only change form. Energy can be converted into matter and vice-versa. The “entire physical universe” came from a singularity composed of that purest form of energy. One variant of this theory states that the universe is cyclical and will fall in upon itself at some point in the future to once again become a singularity of pure energy. Perhaps to be reborn in a new universe.

    Note: This isn’t necessarily the theory I currently accept as the most likely. It’s simply one possible explanation for the origins of the universe.

    can you answer these questions “Les”?

    Why are you putting my name in quotes? Is that suppose to mean something? I can answer the question in as far as I can explain to you some of the theories that have been developed over the years. Can I give answers based on first-hand knowledge? Obviously not. Once again you should consider the fact that I am not particularly concerned with how the universe came to be. It is, at best, a matter of trivia that would be neat to know, but doesn’t impact my life either way.

    id be very glad to see your response

    Well, there you go.

  23. I am somewhat disappointed at your response.  pretty much all you did was give what im looking for another name.  lets dive into my question, to see what i am REALLY asking.  by your response, i believe that the you are talking about the big bang.

    If matter and energy cannot be created

    i believe that we both agree that matter and energy (which are pretty much what runs this universe of ours)  cannot be created.  but, us being here are “living” proof that this matter and energy WERE created.  now, you can say to me that we are really in a dream of some sort and what we see isnt really “there” so to speak, but thats just giving another name to the answer i want, and taking the argument to the next level.  (what i would say would be “where did the dream come from?”  or “what are we REALLY seeing?”

     

    , how were they created?

    you have gone back to the big bang several times during our…vibrant posts, and i have to say that i think its a load of crap.  where did the big bang come from? 

    Where did the entire physical universe come from?

    obviously, the big bang had to start SOMEWHERE.  where did this “cycle” begin?  where will it end?  where will the cycle stop?  the big bang theory is an attempt to disprove infinity, since it pretty much states that at some point, a universe “decides” or “has” to move back to its orginal point of “explosion”.

     

    Note: This isn’t necessarily the theory I currently accept as the most likely. It’s simply one possible explanation for the origins of the universe.

    well then “Les”, why dont we hear about what YOU think, instead of what some theory thinks?  could you put some of your thoughts in your next post instead of someone elses who you obviously disprove?

    -ventricleman

  24. I am somewhat disappointed at your response.

    Big surprise. I predicted as much. Hey, maybe that means I’m really a psychic! I should start my own 1-800-MONEY-4-ME psychic service.

    pretty much all you did was give what im looking for another name.

    No, what I did was try to answer your questions as presented. It seems you’re once again finding it difficult to state what you really mean so I have no recourse but take your questions at face value. Based on your questions I gave the best answers I could. Not my fault if you don’t understand the answers.

    lets dive into my question, to see what i am REALLY asking. by your response, i believe that the you are talking about the big bang.

    By your questions I was working under the assumption that you were as well. If not, then in what context did you intend your questions to be taken?

    i believe that we both agree that matter and energy (which are pretty much what runs this universe of ours) cannot be created.

    Depends on what you mean by “created.” We’ve established that you have a habit of making up your own definitions for words that you then expect everyone else to understand so perhaps this is another example of you using a definition the rest of us aren’t privy to.

    but, us being here are

  25. Testicleman—-oh look mommy, the asshole made a funny!  haha!  do you even know what ventricles are?  obvioulsy not, since you and your lovely friends keep getting it wrong.  oh well, i doubt that you care, even though they are keeping you alive.  well, when your 50 or so and all the shit you have been eating all your life finally takes its toll, youll know about ventricles.  heart disease is a RICH death, remember?  you should be proud of your disease, its literally a feather in your hat.  just think of how many people you had to kill to get heart disease.  i wont go into that today (and im sure that you will get mad at this comment..i try)  i have finals that i need to study for.  im sure you had your chance at them, and probably failed, since your a 20 or 30 or 40 something american LOSER sitting in front of your computer playing computer games all day long.  im sure youll say that you have a wife and whatnot, but that doesnt matter.  judging by your activities (i have found that your website is a rather large complaint station for american losers like yourself (not including me, for i still have a life to live.  your already halfway dead))  i doubt that you really do much.

    well, as i said, anatomy is calling me, and i must go.  (im sure you can find some dirty crack to make at that.  remember, its in your blood.  your SUPPOSED to make fun of people like me, not help poor kids or have a life)

    au revoir

  26. i dont think that im the predictable one here.  pretty much all that you do is make fun of people.  (please remember, i believe that you are justified b/c youre supposed to do it.  i understand why you do it now.  this is your “escape”.)  to me, your….problem with destroying people is that they are never really destroyed unless they join your side, because when they immediatly dont, you break them down.  you sure seem to know alot about people, but not alot about yourself.  you sure dont care about alot of things.  i wonder why you made this pointless website…oh yes, to fulfill your apparent fetish with destroying people and making them into one of you. i doubt that they really want to, because im sure that your lifestyle is immensly depressing.  but you “release” them from their former selves and let them wallow with you in depression.  btw, have i told you that you should seek help?  you sound depressed.  (perhaps this has something to do with your fetish?)  here, why dont you take a week off of your little site and actually DO something for a change.  perhaps you are atheist b/c all you see is your walls and computer, and you never really get out.  therefore, you have nothing to live for.  well, im rambling on.  im sure that youll dissect my entire comment like you usually do and add in your little quirks that make you feel good.  i hope you take my advice, “Les”, because then you could stop being depressed.

    oh yeah—the reason i put quotations around your name is because, well, what kinna name is “Les”?  obviously, i hope you made the assumption that my name ISNT ventricleman, or how you would like to call it, testicleman (rather….demeaning.  you know, depressed emotions, such as homosexuality are often represented by the demeaning of others.  and this testicle thing…hmmm, put two and two together…)  anyway, i hope les isnt your real name, otherwise…well you have a weird name in my opinion. 

    -ventricleman

  27. That is a good question “Les” (if that IS your real name). What kind of name is that anyhow? Is it Jewish?

    I have been laughing for the last 5 minutes over this, has it finally come down to name calling?

  28. It certainly looks that way, doesn’t it Eric? I don’t know how much longer I can keep this up. Good old Corpuscleman has got me all figured out. I may have met my match in this battle of wits. It’s almost like watching the American military roll all over the Iraqi’s only without all the cool military hardware. Esophagusman sure is amazing. If I laugh much harder my sides are going to split.

    Oh, that’s right, I’m supposed to be depressed. Forget my mentioning laughing. Sobbing! That’s what I was doing! I was sobbing at how devastated I feel over his brutally witty assault! Oh woe is me! *snicker*

    And, yes, my name really is Les. Even shows up on my monthly paycheck. I don’t think I’m Jewish, though I am circumcised so I could be. Will have to double check that.

  29. I have been laughing for the last 5 minutes over this, has it finally come down to name calling?

    let me think back for a minute on the posts that weve had…YOU were the first two people (im speaking of eric and “Les”) who brought out the pubescent humor.  obviously, niether of you have grown up.  i guess this is your midlife crisis.  missing your childhood perhaps?

    It’s almost like watching the American military roll all over the Iraqi’s only without all the cool military hardware.

    oh god, not another one of those anti war protestors.  i doubt that you cared about those people BEFORE this america you speak of liberated iraq.

    Oh, that’s right, I’m supposed to be depressed. Forget my mentioning laughing. Sobbing! That’s what I was doing! I was sobbing at how devastated I feel over his brutally witty assault! Oh woe is me! *snicker*

    deep down, “Les”, im sure that you are depressed.  remember, denial is the first stage of acceptance!  stick in there squirt!

    And, yes, my name really is Les. Even shows up on my monthly paycheck. I don’t think I’m Jewish, though I am circumcised so I could be. Will have to double check that.

    i REALLY didnt need to know about your penile state.  i could care less, in fact I NEVER WANTED TO KNOW.  i dont know why you brought that out.  in fact, why dont you NOT tell me, okay? 

    -ventricleman

  30. let me think back for a minute on the posts that weve had…YOU were the first two people (im speaking of eric and “Les”) who brought out the pubescent humor.  obviously, niether of you have grown up.  i guess this is your midlife crisis.  missing your childhood perhaps?

    There is a difference between pubescent humor and simple name-calling. Have I grown up? In some ways, yes, in others, no. Some would say there is wisdom in never fully growing up.

    oh god, not another one of those anti war protesters.  i doubt that you cared about those people BEFORE this america you speak of liberated iraq.

    What makes you think I care about them now? No, I wasn’t an anti-war protester. I did bitch about the methods and reasons for how we went to war quite a bit, but I didn’t go out and protest it.

    deep down, “Les”, im sure that you are depressed.  remember, denial is the first stage of acceptance!  stick in there squirt!

    If being depressed feels this good then I hope I never recover cause I’m having a great time! You certainly seem to think you know a lot about me and how I feel “deep down.” But then when you live in your own little fantasy world I’d imagine it must be easy to know everything.

    i REALLY didnt need to know about your penile state.  i could care less, in fact I NEVER WANTED TO KNOW.  i dont know why you brought that out.  in fact, why dont you NOT tell me, okay?

    What I want to know it why you keep coming back to this site? Perhaps you “deep down” secretly like hearing about my “penile state.” Based on all the email I get from people hoping to help me increase the size of my penis I can only assume that quite a lot of people care about my “penile state.” You’d almost think it was a major topic of discussion across the nation what with all the emails I get from people about it. Any day now I expect to see a headline on CNN.com: NATION CONSUMED WITH WORRY OVER THE STATE OF “LES’S” PENIS! URGES HIM TO INCREASE IT BY TWO TO THREE INCHES!

    Heh, I’m having a lot of fun just saying “penile state” now. That’s one of the funniest things you’ve said so far.

  31. Have I grown up? In some ways, yes, in others, no.

    no wonder your so fucked up.

    Some would say there is wisdom in never fully growing up.

    well, thats an advantage of not living in a third world country.  do they have a childhood?  I SERIOUSLY DOUBT IT.  in fact, you are living off of them not getting a “fullfilled life” like you are.  which brings us to our next topic.  your….lack of care for iraq.

    What makes you think I care about them now? No, I wasn’t an anti-war protester. I did bitch about the methods and reasons for how we went to war quite a bit, but I didn’t go out and protest it.

    sounds like you, a worthless crybaby that complains at a bitching station like your website.  did anything come out of it?  NO.  i think that the previous question should be said at your funeral.  “he was a vibrant man online, but…in the REAL WORLD, he was nothing.”  i’ll be sure to play “and another one bites the dust” at the reception.

    If being depressed feels this good then I hope I never recover cause I’m having a great time! You certainly seem to think you know a lot about me and how I feel “deep down.” But then when you live in your own little fantasy world I’d imagine it must be easy to know everything.

    well, i “seem to know alot about you” b/c ive been having a “post conversation” with you since the beginning of may.  and my fantasy world?  it sure as hell seems alot more realistic than yours.  and alot more useful too.  oh well, “dream on”, huh?  thats the american…fantasy, which you have so gleefully accepted.  i doubt that any nationalist group or “terrorist”, for that matter really cares about the wonderful life that you are having in their wake.

    What I want to know it why you keep coming back to this site? Perhaps you “deep down” secretly like hearing about my “penile state.” Based on all the email I get from people hoping to help me increase the size of my penis I can only assume that quite a lot of people care about my “penile state.” You’d almost think it was a major topic of discussion across the nation what with all the emails I get from people about it. Any day now I expect to see a headline on CNN.com: NATION CONSUMED WITH WORRY OVER THE STATE OF “LES’S” PENIS! URGES HIM TO INCREASE IT BY TWO TO THREE INCHES!

    look, i came to this site to ARGUE with you, not to discuss your…lack of male anatomy.  i dont want to talk about it anymore.  and about my “repressed sexual thoughts” or whatever, ask my girlfriend.  she knows more about them than i do. 

    ps-perhaps you should start listening into those emails?  remember, everything happens for a reason.

    -ventricleman

  32. Admit it. You just like seeing me type “Penile State” over and over again. It makes you tingly.

  33. what kind of response is that?  i told you what i think.  i dont want to hear about your manhood, or lack thereof.  i dont care about you or your genitalia.  if this is some sort of fetish of yours, then i guess you probably might want to break up/divorce your woman and head down to the “boys town”.  i dont like you or your…anatomical parts.

    -ventricleman

  34. And the question remains.
    Is sphincterman a fence post worshipper?
    Oh yeah, also, Do you own buckets?
    ( JethrecOne says you have WOMD if you do!)

  35. And the question remains.
    Is sphincterman a fence post worshipper?

    well, anti-retard, i am NOT a fence post worshipper. 

    Oh yeah, also, Do you own buckets?
    ( JethrecOne says you have WOMD if you do!)

    yes, i own lots of buckets.  but they’re all full of your bullshit right now.  so you can’t borrow them.

    anyhoo, ive talked with some religious people online, and they are better than any of you in every aspect.

    1.  they actually have respect for people, even atheists.  its pretty obvious that you people really enjoy putting other people down. 

    2.  they have alot more answers than you people.  and they are answers that i can believe, not your mindless bullshit about physics and evolution.

    3.  i care alot more about them than i do you.  they seem alot more friendly than you do.  and i even gave them the same introduction that i did you.

    i know that this will probably send you into a hideous seizure of laughing, so ill stop now.  (really you can stop laughing here.  the police will be at your house soon enough because the neighbors think that you’re on ectasy)

    i dont know why you laugh, and im sure that you dont either.  maybe its just one of those fucked up “leftovers” from evolution.  oh yeah, those are impossible.  maybe its just you.

    well, “Les”, JERICTHEONE, “Eric”, and all the other disenheartened atheists that stop for a bitching session at this complaint depot, i bid you my farewell.  im sure that ill be missed.

  36. Missed? Not really. I’m sure someone else just as deluded will come along soon enough for us to play with.

    Incidentally, JethricOne isn’t an atheist. He does, in fact, believe in God and he’s a good personal friend of mine. We’ve had some wonderfully constructive conversations about religion, life, philosophy and the nature of reality without damaging our friendship even though we disagree on many different issues. The reason our friendship survives these conversations is because we can agree to disagree and we don’t take it as a personal attack when the other person voices an opposing viewpoint.

    We both do agree, however, that you’re a nutcase and a laugh riot.

  37. thats really nice.  sounds like a fucking soap opera.  like i care.

    well, i have better things to do.  why i came back was beyond me.  sometimes i amaze even myself….

    i hope to never talk with you again.  bye!

  38. This has got to be one of the most hilarious exchanges I’ve ever read!  You guys are fantastic.  Les, I hereby grant you the honorary title of Grand Evil Atheist (yes, I mean that as a compliment).  It’s good to hear someone espouse so eloquently the things I’ve been trying to argue all my life.  I’m 38, and discovered I was an Atheist while I was in high-school – stayed that way too. (I mean being an Atheist.)  Seems like public education has gone even further downhill than when I was in school, although at the time I thought it could get no worse.  Sounds to me like Vesicleman is probably a female french high-school student.  No, I’ve got it.  It was a CANADIAN [shudder].  I’ve heard of them beasts.  They always come back for more.  No, sorry, actually I think Canadians are a great people, and deserve the same respect as all other primates.  But thanks again for a couple of hours of great reading.  Nice blog!

  39. hello stupid evil bastard
    1. Catholics are the first beast
    2. America is the second
    3. you have depending on your actions between 2 to 5 years before i walk over the massive piles of your and your fellow arrogant, medincine believing [made mainly from natural products take one piece of this plant one piece of that plant throw it in an blender add the now huge belief that these people are gods and you get Made-in-sin, but my witch-doctors and faith healers(not those that charge money) who take one leaf throw it with another leaf and ground it into a paste are pagan useless fucks?]  money-god worshipping
    [YES thats right your god your money god (take a dollar sign add a little snake head and make a wing out of the up-down stroke) Caused september 11 your money god causes millons of people to suffer in your doctor-demi-gods hospitals. your money god causes you to not know what the fuck is going on] Corpses. 
    You will die. You all love money and you all love cursing my father when shit goes wrong.
    WELL FROM ALL THE HIGH COMMANDERS
    FUCK YOU
    I AM NOT COMING BACK TO HELP
    YOU DO NOT DESERVE IT.
    THE SECOND COMING IS CANCELLED TILL AFTER THE POPE, OSAMA AND BUSH KILL YOU ALL.
    144 000 ARE TO BE SAVED THEY KNOW WHERE TO GO
    THEY KNOW WHEN.  AS for the rest when the poising starts either sept 28 or 29 2003 know i am who i say i am.
    Know that i mean it.
    your crimes as a society
    1 the withholding of free energy devices for 100 years the subsequent killing/scaring of scientists and their families.  The damage and true lack of caring about the damage you are doing to the planet, yourselves and most importantly to my brothers and sisters of peace, who are just to meek to fight.
    2 the creation and missinformation of your actions in vietnam. OF COURSE I KNOW ABOUT FUCKING CAMBODIA.
    3 The drug traffic and the world wide drug
    control which goes hand in hand with your economic sanctions and boycotts
    read revalations- the second beast which leads to
    4 the god bless america BULLSHIT
    you must believe in god
    you must be catholic
    or else you are just on of the slaves because of
    your wacky religion, yet aren’t you allowed to worship however you want?
    the ultimate atheiest money god following/ real god cursing society.
    don’t take it personal France and the rest get the same. this is just a small portion of your list

    my only hope here today is that i can start the chain that stops me from having to clean up all of YOUR SHIT not just on the planet but in space as well and like what the fuck am i supposed to do with all the radiated bullshit.
    Anyway do something do something now or when you show up at heaven don’t be pissed that i give u the finger and flush u down to the place of torment.
    GOD BLESS AMERICA to die and not leave a very big mess.
    oh yeah the pictures are messages the idiots rub themselves on it the message receiver well i guess u aren’t one.

  40. I don’t know. But did that hurt your head as much to read as it did mine? Flipping from mixed case to all upper case then to all lower case. The lack of punctuation. The nearly impossible to follow arguments.

    Maybe we do need to put jesus back in our schools:)

  41. Nah, you all got it wrong! If only you atheist – God, who the f*ck is God? – and you Jesus freaks – what, someone has a different opinion, no way! – would open your hearts. The Devil is actually a malevenonet being called Low Key, who tempts people into evil by showing them images of things they think prove their point. I.e. the image of “virgin” mary. in actual fact mary was a slag who did whoever had five coppers whenever joseph was out of town. Anyway Low Key loves to make people think they’ve seen their favourite deity. Watching them drool with religious (or non, if they choose to see a naked Jennifer Aniston {heathens!!} instead) figures is what gets him off. Yeah, I meant that in a sexual term.
    So if you Jesus Freaks and atheist types want to reach the after-Life, simply allow Ap Ho, the pink Rabbit Deity into your life. I know I know, it sounds silly, but when I was five and couldn’t crack Duke Nukem part five the Pam Anderson capers, I opened my heart (with a pen knife) and HE of mighty lord, came to me, and I was filled with esctasy and became free.
    He is a compassionate Lord but if you worship Jesus or Darwin or even that schmuck Bush then HE will burn you in Hell (times four) for eternity. HE’s not a sadistic prick or anything, He just wants you to learn your lesson. Don’t think for yourself, but Worship HIM! or have an Eternity to compemplate your stupidity, dumb fools! hahaha!

    but I love ya anyway, cause thats what they tell me at Pink Rabbit Deity monday school.

    even if you do burn in hell

  42. What i find extremely odd is how exactly they know they have seen some vision of ‘virgin mary’ wtf? I’m sorry, was there some photograph of her and her son somewhere in the bible or did i miss that? Really, am i missing something here? I see clouds in the shape of poodles all the time but i don’t think there is really a crapload of poodles in the horizon, people should get a life, i find it odd that someone would freak out over something they don’t really have much evidence on besides a book. anyway, if god does exist and the devil does, i seriously think god should burn in hell because of theat passove tthing where god killed the first born egyptian because the jews weren’t being freed, i mean if my brother was killed even though he had nothing to do with the jews being killed thing, i would hate god very much, still poor jews and egyptian dudes, if i did believe in god, i would think the christians were worshipping the wrong god. yes, i got a little of subject, anyway, christians are kinda crazy little bastards huh? raspberry

  43. No more crazy than any other religion’s follower’s, Lindsay. And certainly not much more crazy than many atheists. wink

    Which brings up an important point. When I make fun of the people kissing the fence post, I’m not claiming that all Christians are total whack jobs in need of heavy doses of Prozac via a turkey baster, just the ones who are freakin’ over the fence post. As much as I think religion is useless, I don’t think it’s a sign of mental instability or even of weakness. I have lots of friends from all manner of religions and most of them seem more or less normal in most respects (other then the obvious warning sign that they are friends with me which brings into question the sainity of anyone).

    “Religious people” is just a label we provide a group that shares something in common (being religious, natch) much the same way the label “video gamer” applies to us geeks who game all the time. Like any other group you’re going to find some nutcases in amongst the rest of the more or less normal people.

  44. Dear Lindsay,

    you raise a good point about the behaviour of God. In the bible, he does do pretty hard-arse things, and it was not only the Egyptian first borns who got burnt but Jews who worshipped the Golden Calf, and many others too. Yet, even in the new (and improved[?]) testament, not following the exact path means a warm place in Hell is awaiting you.

    According to our current standards of morality (er std. as in what is generally acceptable in the Western world) a person who is considerate and kind is considered a good person. A person who is nasty but respects the laws of God (in both testaments) is actually rewarded while the former, if s/he does not “believe” is not. In fact, they get to burn for eternity in Hell Fire, which as you can imagine, is not very pleasant and there is NO access to morphine!
    It does not seem fair that a supposedly moral person will burn while one who is not especially nice is rewarded,
    but remember there have been many religions where such things as child sacrifice (Baal) or being privledged in terms of being born into the right family (Ancient Egyptian – bonus you get to be a God too!) were a morality that gained entrance into the after-life.

    It doesn’t need to make sense, because it was all contextual to the society, the culture and the people it came from. Faith is often just an excuse to suspend critical thinking, which is a danger to believing and empowering the priest class. The priest class exist in every culture, and generally seem to get a lot of privledges   for doing bugger all. Well, many do have noble intentions and help their community out by acting as councilors. But the priest class is made dangerous by having the power of being right, RIGHT. You cannot disagree.
    I personally think that the priest class should engage those who question on the questioners’ level, i.e. matching argument for argument. But often their position dictates they are RIGHT whatever they have to say.
    Hmm, maybe i shouldn’t type these things while drunk but I am at Rhodes University and along with degrees we churn out alcoholics (to the jesus freak folk, just as many of them are religious as are not).
    It doesn’t matter anyway.
    I have noticed that some of the authors will attack Les but will say they love him. well, love for me is not condemning someone to hell, seeing as love means not wanting that person to suffer (i.e. burning your hand for a moment really sucks and extremely unpleasant but your entire body being burnt in hell-fire for eternity? that is uber-sadistic, and frankly anyone who advocates (i.e. accepts it as the fate of anyone who does not agree with them) that sort of punishment has no right to say they try to spread “love” or “prayer”. in fact the concept of punishment for those who do not agree with them is part of Nietzsche’s concept of ressentiment, which basically is a form of ‘sour grapes’ or more to the point frustration at not getting a sense of power (i.e. converting someone) and twisting things around to suit oneself.)

    Umm, god the whiskey is beginning to take hold.
    so basically life is as is. What you see is what you get. No exclusion of spiritual experiences, if that is what you undergo, but expecting and hoping others to go through the same is naive. Finding others like yourself to share the experiences is one thing, but getting upset because you are being viewed as absurd by someone else is another. Er, also self-contridiction is a no-no.

    Hmm, this amstel tastes good. Well, I suppose if god loves me he will grant me a new liver. oy, I’m a student, drinking lots is part of the experience.

    (public disclaimer: although Antman expresses what could be seen as the opinion of Atheists incorporated, he is in fact speaking for his own alcoholic self. Other atheists and/or agnostics or perhaps even liberal-minded theists are not necessary alcoholics/drug abusers/sex freaks/buffy fans or even supporters of the Gummy Bear Reunion Tour such as he.)

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